June 23rd : Same old

You think theres any glamour in poker playing? Today I got up, took a shower and ate. Then i proceeded to grind/take breaks all day long.

This is what 85 % of my poker lifestyle is.

June 21th = No vegas.

well its the 20th, didnt run as good as I was required to to go to vegas. O well - better luck next time. Ima try to get myself another thous be4 the end of june to clear sum more bills...then its gonna be part time for the duration of the summer....in august ima be able to play full time tho.

So really there are 2 scenarios at this point :

1- I take money out and am stuck at NL50, playing an additional 2 month...god by then ima for sure be a really good NL50 reg..i already am but i dunno if i have the best winrate i could have.

2- I play some Nl100 and see where that takes me...the good thing about that is that I actually dont need to be a super winner to make the same money im making now...the rakeback is so intense the 1000 $ would really be a matter of putting in the hours...which is more interesting for me...Less pressure for the same results.

I have to say that living at jay's is a pretty cool thing, i can go out on a whim, its way less expensive in terms of time and money.....plus when i come back im on my own and really free to do whatever....I like that

its a good motivator to make it on my own and have my own place.
Toodles

June 18th = No vegas

Ive been grinding like an idiot for like the last 10 days? running awful bad...i dont think there has been a single day that i have not lost money

or

That i dont end my day with at least four or five 2 -4, or 7 outers that suck out on the river...or being outkicked...or not getting my draws...or having a set on a board and every drwas hitting..or having an OP like KK and getting against a set...or LOL 22 on 2 TT 4 T ?AWESOME !

anyways....what am i focusing on as of now..

well i read a pooh bag post that talks about how if you dont know your opponents exact holding by the river your not ready to play lag so ive been focusing on doing that.

Also, I thikn I need to respect my opponents bets on the river way more - mb im just running awful, but it seems like they always have something better than me on the river....like if i have KT on a AxxxT board and its been check throu and im IP and he bets the river and i call and he has AJ ? nice. i dunno...work in progress

I actually tilted today, its been awhile

hand that tilted me?

Having JT on a 89Q board that I bet get 2 calls, turn is a J and super aggro donky OPEN SHOVES the rest of his stack obv with TK ftw.

anyways...ima try to clear my rb bonus by the end of the month, get myself an extra 450 and buy some shit before I start school.

Obviously im not going to vegas. Im EXTREMELY dissapointed in that...im really pissed at this fucking running HORRIBLE shit.....it adds up to the anger ive had today, yesterday and for some time now

LOL ppl call me i dont even answer, im in too much of a rotten mood.

June 13th - A whole lot of deja vue...

...but with more money going into my pockets.

First 13 days of just done, I has made 750 euros. My highest point was 1100 about a week ago but thats poker for ya. My first shot at NL100 started on a little swing, but I was quick to get my br back up for another shot. That one got a little better...I did approx 10 buy ins in like 5 days....and of course the major rakeback i get afterwards gets my numbers up while im on a breakeven strech like right now.

Actually the way I see it is I boost my br to a highpoint, that high point was 2200 euro - 600 I just took out, so thats 1600...+ the 100 and 300 of rakeback that gets me to 2000(now its at 1450)

Every hand I play until my br gets back at 2000 euro is what is called a breakeven strech. This means that the time I will be putting into poker is technically not making me money, since I am just getting back at a level I have achieved prior. Poker is a game of high variance tho, it has been a pretty regular story for me up to now, one upswing, one downswing, rince and repeat.

Living at jay's has its ups and downs....Im not sure at this point if Ima go to vegas ...I have to weight in that plan vs the other one : Paying my debts.

If i take my money and start paying my shit Ima be in a good spot for the next months or so....and im talking about debts to people no the bank. I do feel like these people should have priority over me getting myself wasted in vegas..if it was my money Id rather have it in my pockets than watch the guy spend it on himself. + I could take a few hundreads and buy myself some clothing - omg its been awhile since Ive did that.

So yeah Ill have to figure it out.

Btw im supposed to mention(cuz I said I would) that comfypants is interested in getting into the documentary project.

All good.

random rant on wisdom

1 - your gonna run bad, and worst, and worst- but your gonna run better and better and better

so if you keep learning - think back of the worst run at that stake....if you were to have the same run of cards now itd be worst....now think of the best upswing youve had.....it would prolly be better than then.

2- NO such thing as a social poker player...maybe someone will disagree but Id be hardpressed to find a single poker player who got where he was by having a good social time. Making the time/efforts for this means you are gonna spend endless hours on your own, and with your own shit when running bad. Its not fun but it has to be done.

3 - Always respect your roll. If for the last week youve lost2 buy in every day...dont think its gonna take another 7 days @ 2 buy ins a day to make it back up....in me experience I run bad for a longer time then run super hot for a short one...but I make more money - there aint a thing as running hot for too long. Although since running bad is the devil mb it just stays inside my mind longer...and lingers.

3- Lol nobody cares if you make it. I didnt start for others to accept me more or become proud of me or whatever, but now that Im making it I dont expect people to start to care. The people that really care, the people I want around me, are the people that knew i was gonna make it when I was playing Nl10.

4- Putting yourself in a positive environment. Wow im living at my friends loft eating and drinking poker before I start summer classes trying to make it at Nl100....and not having my sis/mom behind me just putting me down and trying to make me quit at every possible time is just a huge weight off my shoulders, makes grinding much much easier to deal with. Especially when running bad.

5 - Even if you play well your gonna play bad. Sometimes your gonna encounter situations where your A game just isnt enough to deal with the situation, truth is you dunno what to do and why. Those situations are going to happen again and again, so you gotta always ask questions and always look for the spots you sucked.

6 - More money will come later, so it doesnt matter if your poor now.

Jun 2 - FIirting wih limitations

Today, I could not play......I could not - I started to, then after about 500 hands I lost a couple buy ins in a ridiculous fashion and I began to be totally indifferent to the game so I had to stop.

This is part of the game, I will obv not do this for a long time but if its just for a day and I do other stuff, I dont mind it as much.....